I can’t imagine what Christmas was like before Nat King Cole.

I have so many wonderful Christmas memories, but I have a hard time remembering them. The “best” Christmas memories I have are the ones riddled with sickness, sadness, embarrassment or mishap. I remember those holidays and the events surrounding them vividly, and many of them happened years and years ago. I call them my “best” Christmas memories because I can remember them better than the others, and since the “lesser” Christmases tend to fade in my mind, these crazy Christmases promote themselves to legendary status.

I recall I was about 10 years old, but I’ll have to verify, and it was Christmas Eve, of that fact I am certain. I was the only person in the family who was not sick with a stomach flu, however I knew it would find me, I just prayed it would find me on Boxing Day. At the time, me and my younger brother Reigner were sharing a room with a bunk bed. That night, for whatever reason, I was on the bottom bunk.

It wasn’t really a tradition, but every Christmas in a while my parents would let us open one present on Christmas Eve. That night, I got red slippers. Red slippers that were shaped like Converse Chuck Taylor All Star Shoes. “Perfect,” I thought, “I’ll wear these the next morning as I run downstairs to open presents” as I placed them carefully next to my bed, ready for me to slip into them and start running with a single motion. I had no idea how my plans would change.

As my family crawled into bed, moaning and delirious from the mass exodus that their digestive system had mandated, I was anticipating the sun rise and the inevitable Christmas that would travel with it. My younger brother softly muttered my name from the top bunk, obviously uncomfortable with the sickness brewing inside him. It was almost as though you could audibly hear his stomach calling for mommy.

I lean my head over the edge of the bed and look up, at the same moment my brother leans his head over the edge of the bed and looks down. You can imagine what happened next, but I’ll push your imagination to the limit by telling you that my mouth was open and everything. I tried so hard to turn my head, but I wasn’t fast enough, and within moments, before I knew it was happening, I was “joining in the reindeer games” with a prompt deposit in my brand new slippers. Suffice it to say, I was sick that Christmas morning after all, but it’s memorable because it’s too hard to forget, thus, making it a classic.